To Be a Good Wife You Don’t Have to Be a Perfect Wife

By: Allysha Lynn I felt the need to make today the most perfect day in an effort to be a good wife to my husband. I got up early this morning with the intention of making my husband breakfast before our day got started. I rushed around getting ready, stressed getting our meal just right, then out the door we went. We had friends over for lunch where I ran around again, getting the house put together and the food cooked perfectly. I stressed over how things looked, how my dining table was arranged, I even worried about what plates to put the food on. All day I spent worrying about making today perfect. Perfect breakfast, perfect lunch, perfect time with friends in a perfectly staged home.  I did all of this because I wanted to be a good wife, which meant I had to be the perfect wife – right? (Click below to grab your copy of our latest book today!) As I stood in the shower exhausted from the early wake up I just kept chanting to myself, “I’m a good wife. I’m a good wife” over and over until I could bring myself to get ready. As I stressed over our meals and making things perfect for our friends I chanted those words again and again. Everything today was set to make our afternoon together a perfect day. Then we went to dinner and I started to feel sick. We left in a rush because my head started to pound. The whole way home I was ready to cry because I suddenly felt so terrible and all I wanted was to lay down. Our perfect day was ruined and it was all my fault. After a hot shower and some time in bed, I started to feel better. I wasn’t worried about our day anymore and without that stress, my headache started to fade too. Things didn’t go as planned, but it didn’t ruin all that happened in the morning that made our day fun. We got to have Hunter’s favorite breakfast and a nice afternoon with friends. The wisest of women builds her house, but folly with her own hands tears it down. Proverbs 14:1 ESV Scripture tells us the importance of a woman’s work in a marriage. All of my efforts this morning helped to build my home, but so easily I could have torn…

Read More

Your Biggest Ministry is the Life You Live

By: Allysha Lynn When you think about ministry, do you think about the life you live? For the first part of my relationship with my husband, Hunter, that’s what I thought about every day. When Hunter and I got engaged, he was working as a worship director in local church ministry. We talked about how we would do ministry together alongside the church. We worried about how our social media would reflect on the church, the clothes we wore, the way we behaved in public. We were in ministry because it was his job to be in ministry. As we planned out our marriage, we planned ministry lives. Then God called Hunter out of the local church and into something different. We left the position in a church and moved to a ministry on the road. He kept helping people come to Jesus and I – well I got to stay home with our dog. Ministry felt like it was ending for me as soon as we stopped being on staff at a church. In these past few months though, God has opened my heart to how He truly wants His church to look. In that vision, it’s filled with people like you and me living a life of ministry. It’s showing people Jesus every day through the life you live. Scripture says it best; And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers, to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ… Ephesians 4:11-13 ESV God equipped each of us to build His church and share His gospel. He did make each of us to be pastors, He didn’t call everyone to work on staff in a church. He called you and me to go and share the good news of Jesus Christ. (Click below to grab your copy of “Becoming a Proverbs 31 Woman“) Not all of us will have the privilege to get to work in ministry. Many pastors, preachers, worship leaders and Sunday school teachers are never paid for the work they do. Our ministry does not come from a job title or from a paycheck signed by a church – it…

Read More

Your Words Will Prophesy Your Future: The Power of the Tongue

the power of the tongue

By: Monique Hatcher It’s something that we do everyday. We do it while at work, at the grocery store, at the mall, and at home. Some of us do it while we sleep! It’s as normal as breathing, and yet we sometimes minimize its importance. What is this “something” that I’m hinting around to? The answer is talking. We speak and communicate using words that come out of our mouths. What some may not realize, is the significance of the words that we speak. We know how important words are by reading what the scriptures have to say about it. It reads in Genesis 1:1-3: In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.  And God said, Let there be light: and there was light. In this passage, I want to place the emphasis on”God said.” God created the universe by speaking it into existence, and we as His children have the same creative power within us. The words that we speak have the power to create blessings or produce curses in our lives. What we say can make the difference between victory or defeat. God wants us to use our words to change circumstances that are not in line with the truth of His word. We are able to accomplish this by saying what God has already declared about us and our circumstances. The law of confession is so powerful. It effects change, not only in our lives, but in the lives of those God has connected to us. We can use our words to edify, heal, and build others up. It reads in Ephesians 4:29: Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Since we are created in the image and likeness of God, we are able to function like Him in the earth. How many times have you been faced with a challenging situation and released words that agreed with the circumstance? I’ve done it many times in my life, and that’s exactly what the enemy wants us to do. He wants us to speak words of fear, doubt, and unbelief. The enemy is powerless against us, as long as we do…

Read More

5 Essential Things to Do While You’re Single

5 things to do while single

By: Jenna Martin The Waiting Room I have always been the kind of person that wants to be in a relationship. For most of my life I found singleness to be intensely painful because, to be honest, it felt like the waiting room where you sit until some guy enters the picture and your real life starts. For most of my life I felt like I was in that waiting room. I’ll start out by telling you a secret: I was believing a lie from the enemy. The truth is, God doesn’t put His children in waiting rooms. Real life begins once we start following Him. About a year ago God started working in this area of my heart. As strange as it may sound, He was coaching me in how to be single. I want to share with you some of the things I did that helped the process and made my future relationship better at the same time. 1) I didn’t make a “list.” “What do you look for in a guy?” I’m not even sure how many times I either asked or was asked that question during high school and college. It seems harmless enough—a girl can dream, right? The flip-side is that the person we are describing when we answer that question does not exist. We are creating them in our minds like a book character. I stopped making these lists because God was asking me to completely trust Him that a) He would allow me to meet someone someday and b) that his person would be someone I would like (God wants us to like our spouses and significant others!). He’s used Matthew 7:11 more than once to remind me that He had something good in store for me: If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him! My “list” eventually came down to two bullet points: Someone who loves God Someone I am attracted to Without a list, my boyfriend didn’t have some abstract concept to live up to, and I didn’t have some fictional character to compare him to. I can just love him and appreciate him exactly the way he is. (Click below to grab your copy of Lord, Prepare Me to Be a Godly Wife) 2) I…

Read More

The Most Important Lessons I Learned During My Single Season

important lessons single season

By: Karen Yango (author at I Am KYT) There seems to be a ludicrous belief that all single people are unhappy, sad, lonely and desperate, but it’s a lie. Singleness is not a poisonous state to be in. Our single season can be one of growth, freedom, and beauty. As a seasoned single, I have learned a few lessons that have truly impacted me. Being single is not a death sentence. My Journey Being single was not always easy. Yes, I had those moments when I would throw a pity party for myself. In college, especially before I found a relationship with Christ, it was difficult to be single and content. People seemed to get booed up left and right and having “bae” was all part of the college experience. I didn’t want much, just a simple hug, a valentine, a chocolate and a buddy to go eat with… (Click below to grab your copy of 31 Days of Prayer for Your Future Husband.) As time passed, I would continue to envy those with relationships. I had a desire to date without understanding God’s standards. Eventually, my desires combined with my lack of knowledge of God’s truth led me to enter a relationship that was not for me. You all know exactly what I mean, there are things that God says don’t touch and instead of listening, we get closer and closer and closer until it burns us. My heart was hardened towards God, I was lukewarm; I wanted to have the label of Christian without having the fire and power of God to fuel my life. A desire that is not matched with God’s will can consume us and poison our lives.  Relationships Are Important Don’t enter a relationship out of a desire that does not match up with God’s will for your life. When I renewed my vow to God and became intentional with my faith, my whole view of relationships and single seasons changed. I finally understood the importance and significance of relationships. The world makes it seem as if relationships are casual happenings BUT God does not see it that way at all. The person we choose to spend the rest of our life with is not a light issue and it cannot be chosen in a place of desperation, ungodly desire, and confusion. Together, you and your mate should glorify the Lord more than you could separately. Marriage is more…

Read More

8 Faithful Tips To Encourage Your Husband

8 faithful tips to encourage your husband

8 Faithful Tips To Encourage Your Husband The original publication of this article is from Bless Your High Heels. We finished eating dinner and Rocky, made his way to the couch to settle in and watch Sunday night football. This was the routine way he ended his busy weekends. It wasn’t long before I could hear the faint noise of snoring. It was only 7 pm, but Rocky has dozed off to sleep comfortably stretched out in his reclining chair. It didn’t surprise me to see him sleeping I knew he’d be exhausted. These past few months he has been running like crazy. He’s been working overtime every weekend, just to help maintain the household expenses. I’ve been out of work since May, so he has been carrying the financial load for the both of us. He also spends every Sunday at his parent’s house taking care of his mother who has been diagnosed with stage 4 cancer at the beginning of this year. So to say he is exhausted is honestly an understatement. I know he is truly exhausted mentally and physically! He continues to push through, he’s a hard worker, there’s no doubt about that. there are times like this that remind me of just how hard he pushes himself when the going gets tough and he knows the people he loves need him. (Click below to grab your copy of Lord, Prepare Me to Be a Godly Wife.) There is a lot of weight on his shoulders. In fact, I’m sure I can say that about most husbands. Even when they aren’t facing illnesses or deadlines at work, they are dealing with the spiritual and financial responsibilities that come with being the leader of their family. Although it may appear that they have everything under control, most husbands would not only appreciate the encouragement from us, it would also be beneficial for them most of the time a man just wants a little support and encouragement. They need someone to tell them that they are men of value created in the image of God, perfect for each of us. We each have the ability to encourage our husband and remind them that they too are loved by an almighty God, and by us. Here are some creative ways we can do that: TELL HIM THAT HE’S DOING A GREAT JOB. Let him know that you appreciate what…

Read More

Allowing God to Renew Your Mind

Allowing God to renew your mind

By: Monique Hatcher Whether you realize it or not or even believe it, the way we think has been conditioned and programmed by external factors. The information that we use that determines how we treat others and the type of decisions we make, is directly related to how our minds are “wired” or programmed. Our perceptions, mindsets, and ideologies have been shaped and formed by a number of different elements. How we feel about situations and circumstances, and our response to them, has a lot to do with who and what formed our thinking. We are conditioned to think a certain way based on the influence in the homes we were raised in and how our parents thought about and handled things. (Get our latest devotional, “Lord, Prepare Me to Be a Godly Wife,” here.) Our formidable years is a period of time when we are most impressionable. We tend to take on the mindsets and behaviors of what we’ve heard and seen demonstrated in our homes. For example, if Mama used bleach in the dish water, then more than likely as adults we will use bleach in our dishwater. Our culture also has an influence on why we think what we think. Different norms and what is acceptable and unacceptable, is derived from certain demographics, language, and values consistent with that particular culture. Lastly, our own personal life experiences influence our mindsets. When we come into the family of God, through accepting Jesus as our Lord and Savior, we soon discover that how God thinks and how we think are quite the opposite. In order for us to benefit from our relationship with God, there has to be a paradigm shift. We have to learn to develop a new way of thinking that will require us to abandon some of the mentalities that we identify with. It reads in Romans 12:2: Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect. We sometimes struggle with obedience to God due to an unrenewed mind. Our thoughts will produce actions in our lives. Our bodies will respond to the thoughts that are most predominant in us. This is why it’s so important to think the right things based on the truth of God’s word. We must get rid of “stinking” thinking. The enemy will always try to influence what…

Read More

Let God Love you Back to Life

letting god love you well

Its been a while since I completely poured out my heart in a blog post. Many of the blog posts I write on here are for you, but today, this one is for both of us. I need healing, and you may be reading this right now because you do too. A dear friend of mine just the other day told me not to be afraid to share my testimony because it had the capability to touch a hurting world, but I often coward at the thought of sharing where I’ve been, and I cringed with tear-filled eyes as I think back on certain parts of my past. I’m a vivid dreamer, and when I wake up from nightmares with clammy hands and feet and watery eyes, pain comes rushing in like a flood and ravels me in a web. Maybe you experience this too. Sometimes the pain of abuse and neglect resurfaces in our daily life, long after the incident took place. Sometimes our “fight or flight” kicks in, and we become an ocean of emotions as we go about in our daily lives. How often do we stop and just allow ourselves to feel the pain? We disguise it behind activities, behind work, behind our phones, behind a smile. (Click below to grab your copy of 31 Days of Prayer for Your Future Husband.) We allow so many things to fill the void rather than dealing with what our hearts are trying to work out in order to bring healing to us. Just recently God told me there was pain that I needed to allow myself to feel rather than covering it up and refusing to deal with it. The beautiful thing about life is that pain is only temporary, fortunately for us. Pain does not last forever. People will come and go in your life, but we have a friend who sticks closer than a brother. People may lie on you, manipulate you, and try to damage your reputation, but we have a God who vindicates the cause of the righteous. You may discover the people you loved so much and cared for more than anything in your life may just not be capable of love, but that has nothing to do with you. There is nothing wrong with you when people refuse to see your worth, there is something wrong with them. The pain we experience…

Read More

Becoming Brave: Seven Hallmarks of Courageous Women

becoming brave women

By: Patricia Engler Wouldn’t it be great to be brave? I mean, think of all those valiant women of the Bible who rolled up their tunic sleeves, took a deep breath and changed history. Like Jael in the book of Judges, who single-handedly slayed an enemy king using only the implements available to an everyday housewife—er, tentwife. Or Rahab, the prostitute whose entanglement in an espionage adventure saved her family and landed her a place in the New Testament “Hall of Faith.” And don’t even get me started on Esther. What kind of captive orphan girl becomes Queen of the World and then risks her neck to invite her husband on a date that spells doom for her nemesis and deliverance for her nation? And then, there’s me. Oh, some days I get to exercise my inner “fearless female.” She’s the one who likes to do crazy things like jump on a motorbike in Africa, or kiss an alligator, or rappel face-first down a cliff. But on more typical days, I come face-to-terrified-face with my inner wimp. She’s the one who the sight of blood sends running. The one who—don’t tell anyone—once jumped when the toast popped. Hey, even the uncertain grayness of debris in the kitchen sink strainer makes her cringe. Fortunately for kitchen sink warriors like me, history’s courageous women of God have a lot to teach us modern day disciples. For starters, we can learn from seven things these women have in common:   Brave women are women of God. This is the big one. Brave women know they have every right to be afraid, because they understand that they can’t accomplish a single thing without God. Having committed their lives to His will, they seek Him in obedience as weak vessels through which He can accomplish great things at His discretion. Mary, Jesus’s mother, modeled this mindset when she told the angel Gabriel, “I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.” (Luke 1:38, ESV.)   Brave women are women of mission. Because they are women of God, brave women are women of priority. In serving the God who is stronger than themselves, they live for a commandment, a calling and a kingdom that is greater than themselves. So, they determine that it doesn’t really matter what happens to them. This sense of calling is the undercurrent we hear…

Read More

How to Begin Healing When Your Heart is Broken

how to heal broken heart

By: Desire Dupper One of the hardest things in life to face is a break-up. I am currently in that dark valley, that place where everything feels surreal. We met three and a half years ago. The first time I had laid eyes on him, I knew that my heart had been stolen. He was madly in love with me too, yet a week ago – after a beautiful relationship – he confessed that he was “not happy with the way things turned out in our relationship” and that “he needs to find himself.” What? You’re kidding! I wish I were, but I’m not. Many things haunt me, things that I should have done differently. I should have worked harder, been less selfish, etc… But my number one focus right now is to be consumed in prayer and in the Word. (Click below to grab your copy of Lord, Prepare Me to Be a Godly Wife.) I am sure you have been at that point where you lost the man you thought was “the one.” It shatters everything and brings all your dreams down to the ground. Praying for God to bring him back to you is inclination because it seems to be a simple  fix to stop the pain and fix your brokeness. But today, I propose to you – and myself – that we begin to change the way we pray in times of broken-heartedness. Praying for someone to take you back just because you want the pain to stop goes against God’s will for you. Our number one prayer should be that God’s will be done in our lives. This does not come easy as I find myself biting my tongue every time I want to plead with the Lord to send me back the love of my life. But if God allowed him to walk away from me, is he really “the one?” While I cannot give a clear answer to this, here are two possible scenarios: Maybe this man really needs to find himself, grow spiritually, learn to accept that all relationships are hard at times, and then he’ll wake up one morning and realize that I am everything he’s ever wanted in a woman, run back to me, get down on that knee, and then we live happily ever after. Yay! Or maybe this man really cannot handle my strong personality and has fallen…

Read More